Chapter 1: Understanding Surrender

What exactly are we surrendering to? It’s life itself. Why? Because relinquishing the struggle can bring immense relief.

Greetings! Is there someone home within you?

Yes?

Who might you be?

I’m Roshana. I’m not just a collection of letters or a physical form.

You’re also more than your name or body.

Even if you were to lose a limb, you would still be you. Right? You’d still be there inside.

In fact, even if every limb, both kidneys, and an eye were taken away, you'd still exist within.

Your body has undergone many changes since you were three, ten, or twenty-three. Despite these transformations, the essence of who you are remains constant—the one who perceives the world through your eyes.

Let’s affirm together:

“I am the observer. My body is merely a vessel.”

“There is only one observer: me.” So, who am I?

I perceive the outside world as it enters my consciousness.

Who is this being that observes the incoming world?

I am the essence, the soul.

What is it like within?

Sometimes it’s pleasant, but not always enjoyable.

I exist here. I am aware of my thoughts, yet those thoughts do not define me.

A Journey of Surrender

These thoughts are drawn from a course titled “Living from a Place of Surrender” by Michael Singer, which I explored with friends recently. Singer, the author of the New York Times bestsellers “The Untethered Soul” and “The Surrender Experiment,” has a new book titled “Living Untethered.” In addition to being an accomplished author, he is a software entrepreneur as well as a yoga and meditation instructor. Quite an intriguing individual!

Though I found his audio presentation somewhat grating, the concepts he shared have profoundly impacted me.

Step One: Realization

The first step toward surrender is recognizing that you’re truly present within yourself. You are the sole occupant inside. However:

You are not your physical form.

You are not your feelings.

You are not your thoughts.

You are the essence, the consciousness.

You are the enduring, consistent being. Your essence is beautiful and free-flowing.

The Challenge

If your natural essence is inherently free and lovely, why does it feel so chaotic inside?

The world is constantly pouring in.

Your emotions respond to what you experience.

Your thoughts chatter about those emotions as they arise.

Let’s examine reality: The present moment has nothing to do with you. Everything you see has taken billions of years to arrive at this point. Every element is the result of a complex chain of events.

You inhabit a world you did not create; it has been shaped by actions outside of your control, as well as by your past actions regarding situations you were unable to manage.

The key is to break the habit of believing that external rearrangements will resolve your issues.

When discomfort arises, we often think the answer lies in stopping it from entering our lives. Conversely, when we feel good, we strive to maintain that state.

This leads us into a continuous struggle, assessing what we like and dislike—an exhausting endeavor!

The River Analogy

Visualize your life as a river. Each “I don’t like this” or “I want more of that” is akin to a rock obstructing the flow. Over time, your river becomes cluttered with rocks, branches, and debris. The world flows through this river, and as the water (representing the world entering your consciousness) navigates around these obstacles, it creates disturbances—eddies, ripples, and turbulence.

These obstructions lead to noise, which becomes our focus.

The Question of Surrender

Is it possible to combat these obstructions? Shouldn’t we confront these challenges?

Unfortunately, waging war against our “stuff” only amplifies the issues.

Yet, we want to clear this clutter because it creates a congested internal environment filled with opinions, preferences, triggers, and cravings.

Each of these obstructions represents stored energy, holding memories and emotions linked to their origins.

We often seek to understand why specific emotions arise, but the reality is that understanding isn’t necessary. You can simply acknowledge their presence without needing to label or identify them. The more we try to analyze and categorize, the tighter our grip on them becomes, keeping them close.

Letting Go

None of this is personal. Life unfolds as it will. We can allow experiences to enter our awareness, acknowledge them, and then release them.

Clinging to something we cherish can be painful:

“Oh no! It’s gone! I want it back! I’ll never see it again!”

Conversely, trying to push away what we dislike is merely another form of attachment. We often try to compartmentalize negative experiences, keeping them tucked away, only to resurrect them later when triggered.

It’s like capturing a foul smell in a jar to revisit it repeatedly—it wastes energy and steals your time.

The Path to Surrender

To surrender, you must embrace everything.

As life enters your awareness and you feel anxiety or sadness surfacing, recognize it: “This moment is touching my past.”

Instead of resisting, greet these feelings: “Welcome, Anxiety. I acknowledge you, Sadness. Come on in; you are welcome here.”

Breathe deeply and allow these feelings space within you.

Lean back slightly; give them room to exist.

Acknowledge their presence: “You have a place here because you are here. This is my reality.”

After a moment, visualize these feelings passing through you—moving from your belly or chest and flowing back into the universe.

Feel the release: “Ah, it feels good to let go.” Then continue with your day.

Embracing the Practice

If these feelings arise again, repeat the process. This is the practice.

Relax and release—again and again. It’s a dance of energy, allowing the flow of life to move through you more freely.

Meditation as a Tool

Meditation can aid in this journey. It’s about observing the mind’s chatter without engaging with it. Focus on your breath, count your breaths if you wish, and when distractions arise, return your focus to your breath.

You may also choose a mantra: “I am relaxing and releasing. I am allowing space and letting go.”

Practice affirming: “I am me. I am in charge. This is my space, and I will keep it clean.”

Recognize that your spiritual journey is about shedding the burdens of the past.

Life itself is your practice. Allow it to be easy.

Your Empowerment

You possess the power to liberate yourself from past experiences.

Nothing is holding you back except your own mind.

You created your thoughts; they do not wield more power than you do. You can change them. You are empowered.

What Comes Next?

When the life force flows freely into your heart, unimpeded by past burdens, it nourishes you.

You begin to experience happiness.

You feel a sense of upliftment within.

You find joy in simple things, like the sound of a bird singing. Your perceptions deepen as you become more open and receptive. The absence of rocks in your stream allows beauty to flourish.

You discover a river of joy flowing within you.

Seek it out, immerse yourself in it, and let it envelop you.

Ready to Begin?

I encourage you to try this approach. It has been incredibly beneficial in my life—helping me navigate both trivial annoyances and deeply rooted, painful memories. Granting these moments the space to exist, welcoming them, and knowing they are transient brings immense relief.

Please share your experiences with me. Remember, the practice is all about relaxation and release, repeatedly.

Best wishes!

Chapter 2: Practical Insights for Surrender

In the video "How to Avoid a Sucker Punch," viewers learn strategies for staying centered and avoiding emotional turmoil, particularly when faced with unexpected challenges.

In "How To Deal With A Sucker Punch," the focus shifts to practical techniques for managing emotional reactions and cultivating a sense of peace amidst chaos.