Embrace Reality and Find Your Path to Growth
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Chapter 1: Understanding the Challenge
Recently, I found myself in a familiar predicament. I had initially crafted a different article, only to later dismiss it completely. This is something that happens sometimes, and it's not unusual. However, I inadvertently fell into the very trap I aim to discuss today.
My routine typically involves writing something that excites me, only to return the next day and think, “This is terrible. How did I ever find this appealing?” Despite this, I usually manage to revise it and restore my enthusiasm. This time, however, I spent several days caught in a cycle of negativity, with thoughts like “Why is this so difficult?” and “I’m over this.” To cope, I would snack, brew coffee, and watch endless cooking shows.
I was resisting the reality of needing to write about accepting reality.
I firmly believe life is a blend of emotions—both positive and negative—and that we aren't meant to feel great all the time. The pressing question is: why do we often extend our stay in the negative?
Most people likely don’t adore their jobs every single day, but typically, we can refocus and recall our initial motivations. The same concept applies to pursuing healthier lifestyles or managing finances; there are periods of flow and periods of stagnation.
The real issue arises when we begin to battle our circumstances. The negative thoughts I was experiencing—like “This shouldn’t be so hard” and “I don’t want to continue”—only contributed to my feelings of frustration and sadness. Prolonged indulgence in these thoughts can lead to feelings of depression and resentment.
Have you ever attempted to be productive while feeling down and resentful? (Rating: 0/10, would not recommend).
It’s easy to point fingers at our work, health, or financial situations for our unhappiness. However, when we blame external circumstances, we relinquish our power to improve our feelings and change those circumstances.
To reclaim that power, we must shift the thoughts that keep us trapped in negativity.
This video titled "How to Stop Resisting Reality and Fighting What Is!" provides insightful strategies to help you embrace your current situation and move toward a more fulfilling future.
Section 1.1: Accepting Your Current Situation
To clarify, I’m not suggesting you plaster on a fake smile and force yourself to love your current situation (I would never advocate that). Recognizing that you're not where you wish to be signifies readiness to contemplate moving forward and improving your life.
What I’m suggesting is to acknowledge your present state, viewing it as neutral—you have a job, a body, a bank account. Accepting your current circumstances does not mean they will remain unchanged.
Instead of pouring your energy into resisting your current state, consider redirecting that energy toward exploring what you might want to pursue instead.
Be prepared: when you prompt your mind to consider next steps, the default response will likely be “I don’t know.”
Never accept “I don’t know” as a final answer. Instead, pose more constructive questions, such as, “What if I do know, what might that look like?” or “If I could earn money doing anything, what would it be?”
Subsection 1.1.1: Understanding the Comfort of Stagnation
Staying entrenched in our unhappy thoughts can seem beneficial in a way. Remaining in an unhappy situation allows us to take on the role of victim, relinquishing our power to effect change. By doing this, we can avoid the responsibility that comes with making changes, which often involves taking risks and facing potential failures or embarrassment.
Our brains are wired to keep us safe, which often translates to maintaining comfort. However, comfort and happiness are not synonymous. We cling to what feels familiar, even if it doesn’t bring us joy. This is why many remain in jobs they dislike; while they might not be happy, the familiarity provides a sense of security, preventing them from risking the unknown.
Section 1.2: Taking Steps Forward Despite Uncertainty
You might need to hear this: you don’t have to have all the answers to begin moving forward.
It’s okay to be uncertain, to feel fear, and even to make mistakes (and chances are, you will). What matters is that you take action regardless.
None of us were born with the ability to walk, drive, or write a blog; we learned through practice. Interestingly, as children, we often approached new challenges with less fear of failure. As adults, however, our instincts tell us new endeavors are too daunting, leading our minds to respond with “I don’t know how.”
Never let your brain rest at “I don’t know how.”
The “how” consists of researching the task and taking that first step. There are no right or wrong choices here—just decisions waiting to be made. Choose one direction and give it a try. If it doesn’t yield the results you hoped for, pivot and try something else. It’s genuinely that straightforward (though not necessarily easy).
Once you’ve made a decision about how to progress, commit to it wholeheartedly. Resolve to stick with it for a designated period before reassessing and potentially shifting gears.
You may not hit your initial target, but you just might. Or, you could find yourself on a completely different, even more rewarding path than you ever envisioned.
You might also discover personal growth along the journey.
The second video, "How To Stop Arguing! - Watch This To Make Your Relationship Last Forever," offers valuable insights on fostering healthier communication, particularly during challenging times.
Key Takeaways
- Acknowledge your current reality. It’s not about loving it, but rather realizing that resisting it wastes valuable time and energy.
- Understand that remaining stagnant may appear easier than taking steps to change your situation, as it requires no risk or commitment; however, it leads to ongoing dissatisfaction.
- Pose your brain productive questions regarding potential next steps or initial actions. Allow your mind to surprise you with answers you didn’t realize you had. And remember, it’s perfectly fine to explore ideas without the pressure to act on every one.
- Once you’ve identified your goal, commit to one action that propels you forward. Embrace the person you become as you navigate challenges to create the life you desire.
Discover What’s Possible.