Strategies for Earning Through NFTs: A Humorous Guide
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Chapter 1: The Basics of NFT Profitability
When it comes to NFTs, they can indeed be quite profitable, much like any other dubious venture. However, they demand a significant investment of time, energy, and, notably, a few friends.
In this guide, we will explore three effective methods for making money with NFTs.
Video Description: Explore three top strategies to earn money through NFTs, including insights for both novices and experienced traders.
Section 1.1: The Pump and Dump Strategy
To illustrate this method, I’ll enlist the help of my good friends, Kristine and Kristen.
Step 1: I snap a photo of an utterly worthless object and market it as a groundbreaking piece of digital art.
Step 2: Kristine purchases it for 70 gullibollars.
Step 3: Kristen then acquires it for 350 gullibollars.
Step 4: Kristine buys it back for 1,500 gullibollars.
This once worthless digital art is now sizzling hot! Can you believe the price surge over the past month? It’s an enticing opportunity for a discerning investor—like my new best friend, Bob.
Step 5: I reach out to Bob and share all the juicy details about this thrilling investment opportunity. I mention that Kristine, a close friend of mine, is facing some financial troubles.
She’s ready to cut a deal.
If Bob acts quickly, he could snag a 75% discount! Yes, you heard correctly! Kristine is willing to part with this stunning digital masterpiece, originally valued at 1,500 gullibollars, for just 375 gullibollars. What a steal!
I know it sounds too good to be true. Kristine is heartbroken but needs the money. That’s why she’s offering this incredible piece at such a ludicrous price.
Step 6: Bob, intrigued and eager, pays the 375 gullibollars and becomes the proud owner of all the hype Kristine and I generated around this virtually worthless item.
Much love to Bob! From Kristine, Kristen, and me—70% of that love is from me, with 15% each from Kristine and Kristen.
Section 1.2: Social Proofing - Fixed Rate Approach
In marketing, this is known as brand recognition. While it doesn’t directly urge action, it significantly enhances the allure of the product for everyone involved. Plus, it helps attract new clients and lifelong friends like Bob.
Step 1: Hand over 11 million gullibollars to a powerful friend of your choosing.
Step 2: Have your friend buy this uniquely epic digital art piece for 10 million gullibollars.
Step 3: Enjoy a thank-you NFT note for the 1 million gullibollars your friend retained.
The best part? Your friend doesn’t have to lift a finger to transport the "art" from your place to theirs; it’s all virtual—except for the million gullibollars they pocketed, of course.
Some skeptics might question the validity of this. But honestly, what other reason could one have to purchase a "CryptoPunk #5822" for over $20 million? A tax write-off, perhaps?
Chapter 2: Social Proofing - Commission-Based Scheme
Some might argue this is merely psychological manipulation or traditional sales tactics, but I prefer to frame it as a passionate conviction for sharing.
Step 1: Ask your well-known friend to promote your NFT launch on their social media.
Step 2: Welcome their friends into your circle and sell them some enticing digital wonders.
Step 3: Compensate your famous friend with gullibollars, adjusting the amount based on the number of "Bobs" they brought your way.
Non-Fungible Takeaway
To successfully profit from NFTs, you need allies:
- Regular friends to share the spoils of your schemes with strangers.
- Well-known, greedy friends willing to take a cut for buying an NFT and claiming a tax break because "art."
- Friends who might not be as famous but are still eager to stake their reputation for a commission on your NFT sales.
And that wraps up today’s lesson, folks! Now that you’re equipped with the essentials, dive into the metaverse and start raking in the riches!
Video Description: A comprehensive free course for beginners on how to make money with NFTs, covering essential tips and strategies for success.