Chapter 1: The Weight of Memory

You departed long ago, yet I find myself unable to release you from my thoughts. Each time I meet someone new, I unconsciously measure him against you, as if I were a detective attempting to unravel a mystery.

Every time I visit my favorite café, your smile resurfaces in the barista’s friendly grin, igniting a rush of emotions. But, whether fortunate or not, he is not you, leaving me to confront my sorrow once more.

I’ve caught echoes of your voice amidst bustling crowds, turning around in anticipation, hoping to glimpse your familiar eyes or captivating smile. Instead, I am met with strangers, and somehow, I am okay with that.

Frequently, I ponder your life—whether you’ve found solace after our separation. Do you still seek me out in the smiles and gazes of other women?

Your presence lingers vividly in my mind, entwined with various places and faces, making it impossible to let go. Even after all this time, forgetting you feels like an insurmountable challenge.

I’ve ventured into new relationships, yet the only outcome has been a constant comparison to you. The harsh truth? Deep down, I knew they wouldn’t succeed because my heart still yearns for you. Nonetheless, I granted them a chance.

The most painful part is when I close my eyes, only to see your blue eyes and radiant smile. It’s clear that our paths won’t cross again anytime soon. The likelihood of finding someone like you seems bleak, and I’m uncertain if I’ll continue this search.

Yet, I think I must. This quest is the only thread that connects us. If I cease searching, I’ll have to confront the reality that I’ve truly forgotten you—and I refuse to let that happen.

Despite my desire to stop this exhausting pursuit, it’s draining to look for pieces of you in everyone I meet. I wish to ask you something, though: Have you ever felt the same way about me? I need to know if you’re content without me now.

I dream of encountering you on the street, where we could embrace as if the time lost between us never existed. But I know that’s just a fantasy—we will never reunite.

Thus, I will continue this journey, hoping to gather every fragment of you one day. Perhaps another man will help me forget that I was ever searching. Yet, I know there will always be reminders of you lingering in my heart.